Best 18 Funny Quotes# Men Understanding Women-Don’t even try

Posted on July 21, 2008 by D-Wish.
Categories: Videos-Pictures-Humor-Crazy LOL Stuff.

A Woman’s Prerogative is to Change Like the wind!

Women are Funny Beings and the more men try to understand them the more men get confused and disoriented. The secret to understanding women is to realize that they are emotional beings driven by spikes in hormonal changes in the body.

angry woman frowning and staring her face

You must not try to understand, You must only do and say what is listed and you will be FINE (which means you realize they are right (even if they are not) so just shut your trap).
You can say the same thing to them and they could react in totally opposite ways leaving you scratching your head and wondering , “What The Hell?”When a woman tells you she knows what you want —–its what you want.When a woman tells you she knows what We need —–it’s what she wants.

When a woman says, “You’re … so manly” it means—– You’re a little strong on the scent, need a shave, and you sweated a lot.

When a woman says, “You’re certainly attentive tonight”, it means —— Is sex all you ever think about?

When a woman says, “Do you love me?”, it means —– I’m going to ask for something really expensive from you.

When a woman says, “How much do you love me?” it means —– I did something terrible today and you’re really not
going to like it, but if you love me as much as you should it won’t really matter.

When a woman says, “Did you just hear the baby?” it means—– Get your butt out of bed right now, and go get the baby and do what ever it takes to quiet him, so I can get some rest.

This is the Cheat Sheet List to knowing what a woman is meaning when she says these words (it is not complete but it will get you to 55% less days of sleeping on the couch).

1.) Fine : This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

2.) Five Minutes : If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour.
Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

3.) Nothing : This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

4.) Go Ahead : This is a dare, not permission. Don’t Do It!

5.) Loud Sigh : This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)

6.) That’s Okay : This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. That’s okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

7.) The out the blue Thanks : A woman is thanking you, do not question, accept it, move on and Just say you’re welcome.

8.) The dreaded Whatever : Is a women’s way of saying F@!K YOU! You Stupid Stupid Man!!

9.) Don’t worry about it, I’ll do it : Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking ‘What’s wrong?’ For the woman’s response refer to #3. Then you RUN as fast as you physically can!

Email this to the men you know, to warn them about arguments they can
avoid if they remember the terminology.

Email this to all the women you know to give them a good laugh, cause
they know it’s true.

P.s. Really watch out for this one and if she ever says it twice just act like you are asleep when you go to bed but remain awake until its time to get up, and Run The Hell out of there

“Oh”: This word followed by any statement is trouble. Example; “Oh, let
me get that”. Or, “Oh, I talked to him about what you were doing last
night.” If she says “Oh” before a statement, RUN, do not walk, to the
nearest exit. She will tell you that she is “Fine” when she is done
tossing your clothes into the goodwill box, but do not expect her to talk to
you for at least 3 days. “Oh” as the lead to a sentence usually signifies
that you are caught in a lie. Do not try to lie more to get out of it, or you will get raised eyebrows and then
“Go ahead” followed by acts of totally unspeakable things that will make you wish your father had passed this down to you.

Oh One More Thing if she ever says, “I don´t mind if you hang out with your ex.”

Just don’t do it!!! This is what is called a cloaked , “Go Ahead” which is a Fine-Nothing-Loud Sigh and double Whatever rolled up into one Gigantic ,”OH!”